I know for sure when something is not right for me.

You may then ask me, when did I ever feel right?

True …I am not being skeptic but me, just myself.

Still don’t believe I had ever come close  …

But why worry when one has an entire lifetime worth trying …

At least I can move on a happy man having found out all possible ways

which were wrong rather than sticking on to one mistake an entire lifetime

But why lament when I have this moment to myself .. for trial!


Hanging Mystery!

Hanging or capital punishment should be seen as an outdated tool which has lost its relevance and power in today’s world. If it was meant to be a deterrent for the few disrupting the society from the times, or even before, of Christ the purpose is lost today. This method which has endured till date, even with changing regimes over the numerous years since its acceptance, is now meant for those cases casted under the expression ‘rarest of the rare’, which in itself is no rare occurrence nowadays if one is to judge by the reports making it to the front pages of our dailies.

Hanging – the method embodies barbarism, but at the same time is meant for the barbaric so as to deter the rest from becoming so. The idea was to instill fear in the hearts, just like sowing a seed. The fear of this ultimate punishment awaiting you should dissuade anyone from committing such a crime. But how impractical that is today, is the crux of it which the law makers should acquaint themselves more. The law breakers have galloped on and none of these sporadic incidents of so called penultimate punishment will ever deter them.

One of the many reasons for that; is probably the sheer power of the enviously desirable pleasure, glory or fame which instigates them to commit the wrongdoing. They are not the result of a momentous spur or impulse. All these heinous crimes are pre planned and well executed. That attitude is something to think about; in terms of where, we as a ‘civilized’ society are progressing. And such a categorical punishment, supposed to be the severest, meant for the rarest of rare cases, has been planned for execution after a long 20 years! A crime committed while I was in my 1st Std is still pending to be addressed even as I am completing my third year of work life after graduation, followed by a post graduation. That is a lifetime for many, especially for the ones who are seeking an improvident vicious today. What a dreadful lot of time wasted, if it was meant as a punishment deemed to be a deterrent.

The irony of it is, those next in line attempting a crime of similar proportion are never going to be distracted by a judgement, so ineffective or a time lag like this. And as in this case a ruling according to which the punishment to be executed in a span of 10 days from now was upturned by mere political pressure and that too in a case where  a request for relief from the judgement by the guilty was turned down the supreme head of this country. This, a typical example of how the vote bank politics can rewrite many, if not all, in our democratic country!

It’s high time the system is changed for the better. We need judicial reforms, much stronger laws which need to be implemented effectively. When I say it should be effective it means a punishment termed as rigorous imprisonment should do justice to the literary meaning of that phrase. Not the example of today where an ex-minister found guilty of corruption and termed for one year rigorous imprisonment, has been provided a TV and a cot with mattress in his ‘small apartment’ in jail and just halfway through his term, was even able to manage his way out on parole thrice amounting to more than 90 days, in this time period itself.

Court proceedings and judgements should expedite otherwise the law itself is provisioning the luxury, of time, to these peace breakers thereby prompting many more. Let us not facilitate them to make a mockery of our well conceived constitution and judiciary. We do not need a 20 yr later capital punishment to instill fear in the wrong doers, but rather adopting these stronger fundamentals and executing them appropriately will do more good to our society in future.

Multum in Parvo

How mysterious his creativity is…
Hidden behind the beguiling veil of flesh,
In its perfections and imperfections
Lie his real art!

Stars : They are in PLENTY ;

MOON : It needs DARKNESS around to be seen and that too only at its peak, u really notice it !

But its only ONE who DEMANDS attention (not just) when it RISES but, even when its SINKING! n at its peak one needn’t look up to see it …

IT’ll let you know,u’ll FEEL it…



Defining Power

This is one term which has been the most sought after thing in this world from time immemorial to the present times. This is said to be the most addictive drug for those who have tasted it can never dream of losing it. Power, the meaning and scope of  it invariably changes with time and geography. If Hitler was termed was termed powerful in 1930s that was because the world was terrified of him. Gandhiji and Stalin were considered powerful almost during the same era. Probably Gandhiji added a new definition to the then existing formula for power, bringing in a new dimension and outlook.

But if you look back at history Power always came with a ruler or someone who could get the masses in accord to his fantasies like Mr. Lenin or Karl Marx. But again the latter never survived at the hands of  the former. But times have definitely changed today and in the process the meaning of power too has altered. Now if you at contemporary rulers who can be termed as powerful ?? Mr. Obama ?? Mr. Gordon Brown?? Or the recently ousted Hosni Mubarak of Egypt or President Zine El Abidine Ben Ali of Tunisia ?? All these people would have been the most powerful as the head of their states probably a few decades back. But see as said earlier the times have changed. Today they all seem more like whips than the rider himself!  If money, luxuries, power, women, and all used to be freebies for them today it doesn’t come in such a combo definitely not the power part.

Money is everywhere today. So luxuries, women, hi-fi life, media coverage and all are not just for the filmstars today it comes with money. Anyone who has had overnight fortunes can have this package. But again power evades them too.

The PM who rules the country of 1.2 billion people is sceptic of making statements but someone like the President of the youth division of the ruling party can come out with bold statements.  The media persons who got entangled in a leaked tape case which revealed their being conducive to lobbying for the post of  cabinet ministers in a democracy like ours are out in the open conducting more debates. Someone like a Chief Justice of India who could just nurture and develop a real estate mafia in his home and make millions in a matter of 3 years deserve the title as the most powerful.

A rapist can become a legislator tomorrow, forget about him being prosecuted and convicted, if he too can provide the right quantity of the combo to the concerned lot. . . A hotel owner can get away with all the water for a neighbourhood with the accomplice of the authorities if he too decides to be “powerful” and can dump the wastes to the same neighbourhood. What a system is being conceived by the legislators of today!

Power today is the ability to get the doors, which confront you, disappear. In that sense if you start analyzing the events around you it does drive some sense. By hook or crook is the conduct in which one can vanish the doors. So if money, women, drugs, luxuries were freebies coming with power yesterday, its just the opposite today. Everyone who can earn dirty money can buy all else. Power can be bought. It can be bought by anyone with any of the factors which can be bought with money.

The same Russia which was ruled by strong hands like Stalin is in the hands of the Mafia today who are entering politics so as to just legalize themselves.  We should also be preparing ourselves for such a posterity.

I work in a bank; a traditional bank in India, in Kerala;  with orthodox, conventional people around me. The bank staff can be easily divided into two demographically with age as the parameter. One with people in the 37- 50 age group and the other in between 25- 30yrs. Now the first group of people are weird in their own peculiar manner. As in each one of them are insecure and comes narrow minded.  Let me skip this part where I go on to explain categorically, each one of them, and reserve it for a later post. Anyhow the other sect with people of my age, is equally intriguing . I cant help think that they believe they were born into a football field, their home since, where one has to keep passing the ball or keep running or else they are lost! Though there a couple of Human Beings among the lot the majority of them fall into the former category.

Now each of the members of the senior group are kind of hostile among each other, good great god knows for what reason. And mind you between the two generations interactions are kind of less thanks to the tiger about to pounce on to the deer approach of the well “experienced” guys over the junior ones.  But recently I was baffled by them coming together, when they started talking ecstatically and with much gusto and elicitation. Goodness gracious what the hell must have happened … even i was curious! So though I was busy doing my work I kind of kept that aside for a moment and definitely gave myself to the great occasion.

“That one suddenly started going up, the moment I gave it off” says one of the juniors. “I told you so, I have been doing this for the past 7 years. But see now my 2 lakhs is at  stake too.” says one of the tigers. “Come on, you got that at 20 and you are complaining. What about me, I got it at Rs 28.” They are talking shares.  Goodness, i couldn’t believe it. They were talking about their investments like they were some household material  and like having just returned from the market (the real market where you get what you eat) to have found that the same vegetables or fish has become exorbitantly expensive over a matter of one or two weeks. Now on the first place god damn’t these are your INVESTMENTS !!  Though academically not a brilliant student I did my post graduation in Finance and do have high regards and respect for the share market and investments in all. Now these people were seeing this just like a game of cards or a game of LIFE. Whats was your purpose of investing man.. oh purpose whats that dude ?? I saw that hovering at 28 and I believed that would go up by atleast 10 points in a week. Bought for 10000 buck.   So thats around 360 shares. 10 points rise in a week gives me 3600… Wow thats a return you are talking of bro! Wake up dude … wake up which world are u in ?? What if it went the other way and thats exactly what has happened now …. Now the junior fellow peps up … ” This scrip was like booming this week …  did u see that .. did u ?? 100 points up .. wow .. if we had that .. wow … ”  Now this is what i call the baby’s day out in the ZOO …. Mamma … mammaa… there, look at that …….. Its a Chimpanzeee … wow … hoooo …. what a shape .. He’s so biggg mammaaa… I think only my HE-Man can topple him off… ” This is a syndrome … the guy had no idea about about share market and trading till 8 months back, the time he joined the bank. A delivery guy from a trading firm visits our bank daily to deposit the firm’s cheques and he influenced and prompted the guy into this. This is really interesting, how does he really view this. I have no idea. There is only one possible answer the guy is pretentiously just gambling. No, not even speculating. This is sad, yes really yes. Lets forget the backdrop pf share market, but the fact that someone is putting in his hard earned money into something about which he has no clue is ludicrous and utter nonsense. Where’s the rational ? Even the ones who claim they are the masters and have been doing this for the past 7 years have no clue why they are investing on a particular scrip!

Can’t help but remember the words of Mr. Warren Buffet which he attributed to the great Benjamin Graham’s brains, that one should know the company he’s investing. If you do not know where the firm is, what it does, its cash flows and markets do not invest. Remember the word in share markets should always be Invest. You are investing in a particular firm by which you are not just putting in money, but sharing its vision, mission and because you believe in its business model.

Anyhow they all, the tigers and the deers, united and transpired though in mis-understanding! God, save the market coz its these  buggers who at the end of the day form the majority!

The lone fighter : never will i fall … however strong “thou” may; let thou snow & rain on me; thou may blind me with mist;I stand rooted !   This thought came up as a result of my experiences in life.

I always used to complain about the subtle misfortunes I have had. Maybe they seem trivial today considering the greater predicaments I have had to confront later on. Having been placed during the first week of placement season during my MBA program in B school with a package of 5 L.p.a., in the 3rd largest software company in India at that point of time and then towards the fag end of the recruitment season the company itself getting involved in a scam and its promoter getting arrested resulting in the near liquidation of the company and finally a take over. That was enough for the job offer to be disregarded. Later on coming back home jobless, after months of patient anticipation for the right job gets an interview with the cluster manager of a prominent private sector bank. The interview goes well and then clears a couple of other tests too and finally the HR round too goes well. When finally waiting for the call letter after promising feedbacks from the cluster manager himself, one fine day a call comes from the same guy saying I cannot be absorbed since I passed out from a premier institute and that the bank’s HR policies restrict them from local recruitment of students from such institutes. Now, how can one classify this, if the liquidation of the company which recruited me initially was a mere coincidence or pure bad luck.There are no answers for certain things in life. I learnt it my way.. and there is no use complaining. Confronting them is the only way forward, since these are obstacles that ought to be fought and in this battle your mind is the only weapon and shield at your disposal.

Now when I refer to as thou, its meaning is quite obvious I guess. But please do not be of the wrong impression that my saying so is with vengeance or in a mood of reprisal. No I am no atheist. I do believe in a super power. I believe there is some energy that forms the binding force and it controls us as it controls nature. Though I haven’t read bhagavad gita or mahabharatham completely I do have a certain understanding of how the souls are interpreted in it. And I believe that theory, the reason being its rationality itself. So when the scriptures say that the body and the world and all its nuances and magnanimities that we see today, are classified categorically as MAYA and that only your soul is eternal. That being the assumption, then that soul has to be a part of the larger energy which forms the binding force. So then we all human beings are a part of that superpower and we all together form the same power. So then we have that bit of divine nature in us. But in that case do all of us reciprocate the divine features once we are enclosed in flesh and bones, restrained by feelings, senses and the virtue of being enslaved to emotions epitomizing the world of maya. Can we break free.

My opening statement is my attitude towards the same goal. Come what may, I face it with no bias. Karma and dharma determines my course of action. This would take me on the way of truth. Only that, i believe can take me to the supreme power and abet in the rejoining of myself with the larger self.